So last night, after a long exhausting day on the road, and me being super stuffed up for 48 hours straight, I rummaged in the medicine cabinet looking for relief. I COULD NOT BREATH PEOPLE! I wanted someone to punch me in the face just so my face could feel something, anything, cause it was numb. I found a bottle of decongestant syrup belonging to Cashman. Ahhhh, I thought. May cause drowsiness, do not operate heavy machinery, blah blah blah. Sweet sweet elixir, take away all my problems.
Did I mention I had been on the road since noon yesterday and it was oh, ten at night while I was making this awesome decision to down my son's medicine? I was tired, couldn't breath, tired, couldn't breath, and couldn't think straight. I downed two big gulps of the stuff. Went to bed, fell into a peaceful deep sleep. I woke up exactly and hour and a half later. WIDE AWAKE. HEART RACING. JAW CLENCHED. Shit! Did someone slip some speed into that syrup. What the hell did they prescribe my kid? It had completely slipped my mind that sometimes adults have the exact opposite side effects that children do when they take the same medicine.
So I have been awake since midnight. I have the jitters. I just typed this blogpost faster than I have ever typed anything in my life. And...I'm drinking coffee. Smart. So so smart. On the upside, I have absolutely no appetite and I'll probably clean the house spotless, work in the boys room, and scrub my toilets with a toothbrush. Yea me!
Also, I will be using a big black permanent marker to write on that evil little bottle: CAUTION UPPER. WILL TOTALLY RUIN YOUR DAY OR NOT DEPENDING ON HOW MUCH YOU LIKE FEELING LIKE A CRACKHEAD.
*The reason for my little roadtrip yesterday was to find out that the Monster gets his tonsils out next Monday and he can't go to school for a whole freaking week. A WEEK!!!!! That little bottle and me might become good friends.